Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me A Match
Good morning all!
I am sitting here prepping for a Mom Date. This is my first actually. Kind of nervous, really.
Now that Lola is in school, she is making her little friends, which brings a mommy joy. Of course, it makes me afraid as to wondering if one of those tots is going to grow up to be the “Bad Influence” kid, but that is another blog.
Being that Lola is, for the time being anyway, an only child, she doesn’t have a lot of inter-child fun time unless she is at school. In fact, the reason she is in school is solely for kiddo interaction.
Ever since we moved out here, I find myself scouting out other moms. Do you know this feeling? You are at the park, your kidlet suddenly takes a liking to another kidlet, and suddenly you find yourself eying the parent, wondering if this could be the One. The new set of friends, where the children become besties, the moms actually like each other, and soon the bliss of birthday parties and play dates begins.
Without this, there is the fear of your child being the lonely one. This brings guilt. Not a fan of guilt.
But how do you go about making this connection?
I realized that we are in reality, looking for dates. That’s right. We are on the market, looking for a set of compatible mates, though, thankfully not of a romantic nature. Although, more stressful is not only finding a Mom to fit your special personality needs, but the kids have to line up as well.
Ever find another mom, one you could see yourself being buddies with, sharing a margarita on those rare nights off, laughing together at the public pool in solidarity of swimsuit hell, only to discover that the kids don’t get along?
Also tragic is seeing your child bond with the future BFF and then realize you would rather put hot coals in your bra than spend prolonged periods of time with.
Today however, I am entering what is equal parts an Arranged Date, and Blind Date at the same time. Lola has befriended a little gal in her class. One day, the kids made bird feeders and I heard another mother open her childs back pack, see this, and then announce, “Oh dear, we don’t have any trees!”
Being an incredibly chatty person, I blurted out that I bet she lived in a certain housing division. She looked at me like I was either a stalker or bat shiz crazy. I explained that I assumed as such since I live in that division, and also have no trees.
Laughs were had, then we realized we lived literally like ten houses away from each other. Turns out her little girl also has no playmates other than school.
I could see it in the Mom’s eyes. She wanted it just as badly as I did. A semi-normal other Mom, kids get along swimmingly, same neighborhood for easy access… All the makings of Play Date Bliss.
We toyed with it for about three weeks. Each of us nervously trying to hint to the other about getting together, but not wanting to put ourselves out there for fear of the, “Oh you, know, I am busy that day. That day too. Yep, and that one.” It was hilarious. It reminded me so sincerely of the dating scene from a blessed decade (!!!) ago, that I would go home and giggle, but in front of her, be just as spastic as though I was meeting Mrs. Right.
Right before Lola’s spring break, and I mean, the last two minutes in the school before we went home for a week, she caught me, and sputtered out asking us on The Date. Lunch after school returned. She adorably launched into several excuses for if we were too busy, or how she might be a few moments late since she is actually a teacher there and would need to tidy up her classroom before leaving. We exchanged phone numbers, and made the plans.
I happily accepted Lola’s and my first Date.
I even twitchily texted her yesterday to confirm. Felt lame as hell, but yeah.
So here in about two hours, Lola and I will set off for our little lunch. It is worth noting that I have done hair and makeup for this. Wanting to make a good impression and all. I am nervous. What if the kids suddenly don’t get along? What if my world famous verbal diarrhea makes an appearance? What if I make a mistake and somehow ruining my little girls one shot at true friendship?
Or, what if they see our abundant supply of awesome, and we all live happily ever after? I am going for that one, personally.
Either way, it is an interesting phenomenon to behold. The rarely spoken of Mommy/Kidlet Courtship.
And while it is possible we won’t be finding our Play Date Soul Mates today at our lunch, at the very least, it is getting that first bit of the unknown out of the way. Who knows, maybe even next time I will be brave enough to do the asking.
Although, I don’t want to be a Mom whore….
Off I go, visit the Mommy and prep for our festive afternoon!
I hope you all are having a kickin’ week!!
Until next time,
Peace, Love and Mom Whores!!!
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Lol. I was lucky in that my friend Amanda just showed up at work one day, with a boy just a few months older than Rhi, and the kids and the two of us liked each other right away. We have had several margarita and BBQ nights (or pina colada and shrimp creole nights, lol) while Shane begrudgingly played the responsible adult to our lush-y selves. We’ve even had sleepovers, haha. So it was pretty awesome/lucky. :)
Good luck with your mom date. :) Too bad we don’t live closer, because once I have this kid and am staying home, I’ll totally be in the market for another SAHM friend.
I am sure she just loved you! You must tell me all about it